I just got an email from a guy on Match.com who seems really interesting but has no profile picture. Why would someone post an online profile with no photo? Do I hit Delete or answer the email?
Kate, Age 37
It is my experience that in the majority of the cases where someone doesn’t post a profile picture it is because they are either married or in a relationship. However, there are actually some very good reasons why some people can’t post photos in their profiles. Some people in high profile jobs or in industries where posting their photo may be a danger to them just can’t take the chance.
Don’t be shy. Just ask. You can start with, hey I notice you don’t have a photo posted. Are you a) Married, b) A public figure, or c) A Member of the WItness Protection Program?
He could be a judge, a school principal, or a prison guard. Or he could be married, in which case you hit the big DELETE and BLOCK button immediately.
I get phone calls and emails all the time from people who run into situations in the online dating arena and need some advice. I’ve decided to start publishing those here so you can all reap the benefit of the answers.
Dear Dating Ninja,
I’ve been exchanging emails with a woman online who has no profile picture, but offered to send a photo via regular email. When I opened the photo I noticed she was wearing a wedding ring. What do I say in this situation?
Sean, Age 47
The wedding ring in the picture raises two red flags. One, she may still be married, and she’s online seeing if there are better fish in the sea. Or it’s an old picture. Either one is unacceptable.
Write back to her and say, I noticed you’re wearing a wedding ring in your photo. You said you’ve been divorced for quite some time. Do you have a more recent photo you could share?